Insidious Insurrection (Overworld Chronicles Book 14) Read online

  "I told you I would. We just need to know where they're being held." I looked at the map. "Where do you suggest we set down so we can enter the city?"

  She pointed to a nondescript area just north of Novus. "The city is a ten-mile hike from this valley. You should have no problem walking that distance."

  "I wish this map was more detailed," Elyssa said. "What's all this space in between the valley and the city?"

  "Farms," Illaena said. "They grow glurk, quintos, and other foods to support the troops." Her nose wrinkled. "They also raise livestock. Some Brightlings consume meat."

  "Doesn't sound too risky," I said. "We just need to dress like the locals and take a hike."

  "We have suitable clothing in the hold," Illaena said. "You have another problem to overcome."

  I raised an eyebrow. "Which is?"

  "Your accents." Illaena cleared her throat and spoke with a slight lilt to her tone. "I should like to purchase a glurk." She stopped, repeated herself, but this time with what I imagined a redneck might sound like speaking Cyrinthian. "I wanna glurk."

  "Are you saying we sound like the second example?" Elyssa said, looking as offended as I felt.

  "Your accents are barely up to Pjurnan standards," Illaena replied coldly. "For you to pass as Brightlings, you will need to adjust how you speak, or they will immediately identify you as an outsider."

  "Wonderful." I groaned. "We used a spell to implant Cyrinthian in our brains. Can we do the same with the accents?"

  "Accents are learned over time," Thomas said. "I suggest you learn how to fake it."

  "Maybe my mom can help out," I suggested.

  Illaena shook her head. "Your mother speaks with a High Cyrinthian accent. That would stand out just as much."

  I ran a hand down my face and looked at the captain. "Can you help us?"

  She sighed. "Very well, but you must do exactly as I say."

  It was going to be a long night.

  Chapter 19

  We spent hours practicing the pretentious accent used by urban Brightlings until I wanted to scream. Illaena finally let us go sometime after midnight so we could catch some shuteye.

  "It sounds like an Irish accent," Elyssa said as we made our way to our room.

  I grabbed my crotch. "I got their frosted lucky charms right here."

  She giggled. "Maybe we should dress up like leprechauns."

  I burst into laughter. "And bring a pot of gold."

  Despite the humor of the situation, it took me a while to fall asleep that night. Tomorrow, phase one of Operation Kaelissa began whether we were ready or not.

  The Falcheen glided low over the water to avoid detection while Alysea channeled a light-bending shield in front of the ship that made it harder for sentries to spot us.

  Shelton leaned heavily on the railing, face pale, but eyes alert.

  "Feeling better?" I asked him.

  He grunted. "Feels like my ribs tried to make love with a grizzly bear, but otherwise, yeah. I feel peachy." He looked me up and down. "You look like someone who lost a bet."

  I brushed my hands nervously on the silky white kilt Illaena assured me was all the rage in Brightling fashion. "It looks silly, but man, does it feel nice on my legs." I ran a hand along the billowing white shirt. "Besides, this makes me look like an Irish pirate captain."

  Shelton snorted and turned back to the kilt. "You got panties on under there too?"

  "Silk boxer-briefs." I flashed a grin. "Jealous?"

  "Maybe a little." He looked back down at the water rushing beneath the sky ship.

  Normally, Shelton would've mercilessly poked fun at me, but it was obvious he was pretty down on himself again. "Look, it was a hard battle. It's just bad luck a piece of that crystal got you."

  "Yeah, right." Shelton spat over the side. "I'm just a level fourteen wizard against a world full of level ninety-nines."

  "More like level thirties," I said, sticking with the nerdy reference. "If you can't overcome with brute strength, try being sneaky."

  "That ain't my style." Shelton stood upright and winced. "That's like trying to turn a knight into a thief. You can't be sneaky when you're clanking around in armor."

  "Now you're just coming up with excuses." I leaned my back against the railing. "If a bull is charging straight at you, are you going to try to overpower it?"

  "I know what you're getting at," Shelton said. "Of course I'd jump out of the way. But a Seraphim ain't a bull. A bull can't spin on a dime and fire a damned death ray at your face."

  "Would you shield against the death ray?" I asked.

  He shook his head. "No, I wouldn't stand a chance. I still can't get that geodesic shield spell working right." Shelton's shoulders slumped. "But I can't exactly dodge a beam of light. I'm just not fast enough."

  The Falcheen entered a shallow valley carpeted with pastel-blue grass. Short trees with brilliant orange leaves dotted the hillsides. The ship set down in a meadow and the gangway dropped.

  It was time for me and Elyssa to go. I squeezed Shelton's shoulder. "Don't overthink it."

  He pshawed. "I'm just gonna stay out of the way from now on."

  Elyssa strolled over, looking rather delicious in a creamy white dress, her raven hair done up in small braids laced with white silk. The popular styles for Brightling seras were obviously less silly than what the seraphs wore, but Elyssa could make just about anything look good.

  "Are you ready?" she said in an excellent imitation of a proper Brightling accent.

  I held out my arm. "Yes, my good woman."

  Elyssa wrinkled her nose. "You still sound stiff."

  I groaned. "Maybe I should just keep my mouth shut."

  Shelton snorted. "That's usually a good idea."

  Thomas, my parents, and Illaena came over and wished us good luck, then Elyssa and I headed down the gangway and began the hike to Novus.

  A patchwork of orchards and fields of grains painted the hilly terrain in brilliant colors. There were no skyways out here in farmland, no pylons or access points, just a white crystal road that looked as if it had been carved into the ground with Brilliance rather than constructed with a gem.

  We didn't pass any farm houses, or if we did, they were concealed by the hills. A seraph tending to his glurk orchard waved at us as we walked past. We smiled and waved back, relieved that he didn't come over and try to talk to us. Once we passed him, we picked up the pace and broke into a run, keeping a careful eye out for anyone else.

  It wasn't until the walls of Novus came into sight that the number of pedestrians increased. As Illaena promised, the males wore kilts while the females favored long, flowing dresses. Rich reds and royal blues dominated among females, but the males seemed to prefer pink.

  "They must be a confident bunch," Elyssa quipped as we smiled and waved at another pink-loving seraph.

  Children laughed and played, chasing each other in a meadow while their parents watched and conversed with their peers. Cottony cloudlets laden with foodstuffs glided down the road close behind the farmers bringing them to town. The gates of the city hung open in greeting, though Brightlings in crystal armor patrolled the walls.

  "Doesn't look like they're too worried about a Darkling invasion," Elyssa noted.

  "I doubt that's been much of a concern." I smiled and nodded at a couple walking a small blue fox like a dog. It sniffed me then promptly latched onto my leg and began furiously humping it.

  "Sorry." The sera bent down and picked up the pet. "He's in heat right now."

  I smiled stupidly, afraid to talk and betray my bad accent.

  "Cute," Elyssa said.

  "Yes they are," the sera's boyfriend said, his eyes lingering on Elyssa.

  His girlfriend tugged his arm and the pair continued walking with their amorous pet.

  The bored guards at the gate barely glanced at us when we stepped through and into the town. Whereas most of the buildings in Tarissa were ultraviolet, the Brightling town preferred white or transparent crysta
l.

  A domed building with a sharp spire rising from the center sat in a grassy plaza at the end of the wide boulevard. The houses here rose three stories at a minimum, their exteriors adorned with latticework and statues, far more fanciful than their utilitarian counterparts in Kohvalla.

  Shops displayed artwork, primarily lifelike statues and paintings that all bore a chilling resemblance to the last person I wanted to remember. One statue stood seven feet tall, a female figure holding her arms wide, each hand holding starry-white Brilliance as she prepared to destroy an unseen foe.

  Elyssa read the Cyrinthian imprinted on the base of the statue. "Daelissa unleashes her fury."

  A painting with a demure rendition of Daelissa drew my attention. "Forever our queen." Daelissa was the spitting image of Nightliss, but with creamy skin instead of olive tones and blond hair instead of black. But where Nightliss had been kind, Daelissa was cruel and uncaring.

  "Forever," a nearby sera murmured. "Oh, how I long for her return."

  "Keep still your tongue," her male companion hissed. "Kaelissa is the empress now."

  "She is the mother of the greatest leader, but will forever live in her shadow." The sera turned an imperious glare on her companion. "I would like this for the house."

  He sighed and began bargaining with a portly seraph who was probably the shop keeper.

  We continued through the market, passing stands of food, a shop selling aether gems, and one displaying wares that brought me to a stop. Elyssa sucked in a breath. "Are those televisions?"

  "You've got to be kidding me." We stared at the items on the shelves just outside the shop. Toasters, microwaves, smartphones, and more.

  A pudgy Brightling with a shaved head smiled broadly and approached. "Hello my good people. These are authentic goods plundered from the evil Edenites."

  Elyssa blinked couple of times and recovered her wits. "Do they work here?"

  "Yes, of course!" The seraph produced a blocky red aether gem and pressed the plug of a nearby toaster to it. The prongs stuck to the gem. When he pressed down on the handle, the toaster hummed to life. "This device is for destroying a food they call bread." He ran a finger along a television. "And this is for dulling minds."

  I nearly called him out on the toaster, but couldn't disagree with him about the TV.

  "How interesting," Elyssa said. "Perhaps later."

  "But you haven't seen everything." The shopkeeper took out a smartphone and flicked on the screen. "This strange device can turn thinking people into mindless automatons."

  Elyssa backed away. "I already feel it numbing my brain."

  I finally summoned the courage to speak. "Tell me, good man, did you procure these items yourself?"

  The seraph clapped his hands together. "Ah, I can tell by your accent you are a native of our fair capitol, Zbura, are you not?"

  "Yes, of course," I said, hamming up the accent as much as possible.

  "Were you in the war?"

  I cleared my throat. "Yes, but I do not wish to speak of it."

  "Understood." The shopkeeper splayed his fingers and bowed. "High regards to you, veteran. I am Uro."

  I splayed my fingers back in the standard Seraphim greeting, but didn't bow as deeply as the other man. "Thank you, Uro."

  Two of the city guards paced by on the street, casting disparaging glances at the wares on display. One of them elbowed the television hard enough to knock it over and send it crashing to the street.

  "Careful!" Uro shouted. "These are quite rare."

  "How dare you sully our lands with this Eden trash," one guard said. "We told you to keep it off the street."

  "But they are collectibles from the war!" Uro knelt next to the broken television and looked as if he wanted to cry.

  The guard leaned over. "Get it off the streets. The empress doesn't like reminders of the failed war." He stomped a foot on the TV then marched away with his companion.

  "Not very friendly," I said.

  "Daelissa is still the queen in our hearts," Uro said. "She is still magnificent even in defeat, but her mother wants nothing more than to see that defeat forgotten."

  Elyssa and I exchanged a glance. The first time we'd met Kaelissa she'd seemed pretty proud of Daelissa. Then again, she hadn't been empress back then. Maybe getting her ass kicked in Atlantis changed her outlook on the war.

  "I have not been back to Zbura in some time," I said. "Is the empress there now?"

  "Ah, rumors abound after nearly every legion was sent to Cabala for purposes unknown." Uro frowned. "After all, she took nearly every solider from our garrison and left us defenseless should the savage Darklings decide to attack."

  Kaelissa had massed her troops on the western coast of Azoris, the Seraphina equivalent of North America, and used some of them to attack Atlantis. Why she'd needed so many troops for the effort was still a mystery.

  "We wish to pay homage to her," Elyssa said. "Does anyone here know for sure if she is back in Zbura?"

  Uro sighed and climbed to his feet, sad eyes looking at the broken TV. His brow furrowed as if something had suddenly troubled him and his gaze flicked to us. "You are a true supporter of Kaelissa?"

  "Yes, of course." Elyssa quirked an eyebrow. "Why?"

  He shook his head. "I am certain our empress is safely in Zbura or perhaps even Cabala, according to rumors, but who can say for certain?"

  "I heard Kaelissa commandeered ships from the Mzodi," I said. "Is that true?"

  "Oh, yes." Uro looked up as if a sky ship hovered overhead. "That was very bad for business. The crews were kept at the garrison for weeks and later taken elsewhere when the rest of the legionnaires left."

  Well, no rescue just yet. Illaena wouldn't be happy to hear it.

  Elyssa smiled at the shopkeeper. "Thank you for your time, Uro."

  "It is my pleasure," he replied, turning back to the smashed TV.

  We wandered around town for the better part of an hour questing for information about Kaelissa. Several citizens frowned and hurried away from us at the mere mention of the empress. One seraph displayed open hostility.

  "Why should you wish to worship at her feet?" He pushed his chest against mine. "Kaelissa has stripped us of troops and left us at the mercy of the savage Darklings!"

  Elyssa shoved the seraph away and we made a hasty retreat, dashing through twisting alleys until we lost him.

  "I don't think Kaelissa is popular in these parts." I pounded a fist against the alley wall. "Guinesea is a bust."

  "Tell me about it." Elyssa bit her lower lip. "I haven't seen a single statue or portrait of Kaelissa anywhere—just Daelissa."

  I peered around a corner to make sure the street was clear. "Let's get back to the ship. I guess we're going to have to stop in Cabala to see if Kaelissa is there before going all the way to Zbura."

  "Agreed." Elyssa took my hand, and we strolled back down the crystal streets toward the city gates.

  As we passed through the market again, our friendly neighborhood television salesman saw us and waved.

  "I wondered if you would come back," Uro said. "I know just who you can ask about the empress." He walked toward the shop doors. "Follow me."

  Elyssa and I exchanged confused looks followed by shrugs.

  "Couldn't hurt," I said.

  Elyssa pshawed. "Provided nobody else tries to start a fight."

  We followed the waddling seraph into the building. The inside of the shop looked like something that had been lifted straight out of a big-box retailer, complete with the shelving, marketing materials, and even industrial carpeting.

  "Whoa." I stopped in front of a shelf filled with game consoles and turned in a circle. "It almost feels like we're home."

  Elyssa touched a shelf almost reverently. "This is so weird."

  "This way," Uro said. He channeled into a gem and part of the wall misted away into a downward-sloping corridor.

  I hesitated. "Where are we going?"

  "To the warehouse." Uro walked a few f
eet and stopped. "My comrade is a great admirer of Empress Kaelissa. He will certainly know where she is."

  Elyssa's eyebrows arched. "You have a warehouse?"

  "Yes, filled with the spoils of Eden." Uro puffed out his chest proudly. "You will never see another collection like it."

  I decided there was no harm in asking this friend of his, considering the alternative was to give up and head to the ship, so I continued after Uro. "How did you get all this stuff?"

  "It was not so hard once I found the right people," he said. "What you have seen above is only a taste of what I have to offer."

  I knew the answer to my next question, but asked it anyway. "Do you know a way back to Eden?"

  Uro shook his head sadly. "The Alabaster Arches no longer work, or I would import even more goods. If Daelissa had conquered the mortals, I would live in Eden now."

  We reached the end of the corridor and stepped into a cavernous warehouse. A polished concrete floor, orange metal shelving, and rows upon rows of boxed goods made me feel as if I'd stepped through a portal and into a wholesale club.

  Family-sized bags of Cheezy Poofs, complete sets of dinnerware, microwaves, clothing, jewelry, and all sorts of goodies were here for the taking.

  I wonder if they have my favorite kind of underwear.

  "Impressive," Elyssa said, letting her accent drop briefly.

  Uro didn't seem to notice and spread his arms grandly. "Welcome to the Eden Emporium!"

  "Wow." I touched an unopened bag of boxer-briefs reverently. "How much for these?"

  "Aren't they exotic?" Uro grinned. "Edenites have such strange tastes in clothing."

  I glanced down at his purple kilt, but kept the retort to myself.

  "My comrade, Lando, is down here," he said. "Come."

  Elyssa squeezed my hand and gave me a warning look. "I don't know if we should trust this guy," she whispered in my ear.

  Her ninja senses rarely failed us so I nodded. "Be ready to fight, but act natural."

  Elyssa pressed her lips together, but returned my nod.

  We followed him through the warehouse and into an empty room at the back. Uro channeled into a gem and a doorway appeared. "Please wait here for a moment." He stepped inside and the wall misted back into place.